OMG

Woke up, fell out of bed, dragged a hammer across my head.

Early shows suck. Suckage worthy of its own rant, but lets stay on the rails here. When briefed for an early show a complex series of interelated events is set into motion, all conspiring to ensure

a: very little sleep will be found before show time, and

b: see a: above.

Feh. So the alarm is set. 45 minutes is what I need to be rendered conscience and made clean enough for public presentation. Standard issue sucky sleep interrupted by regular wondering what the fuck that noise was and checking the clock to see, if I got asleep RIGHT NOW, how much sleep I could get before the just checked alarm goes off and the official hygiene phase begins.

Really? You have got to be kidding me. Flip over. Remash pillows into shape.

The compulsive checking of clock is a pilot thing, I don't know if other people in other professions do this, probably, but who they are I have no idea. Im down to a single alarm. No small feat. I think most other guys have multiple back up alarms and wake up calls. Im rolling the dice. One day the alarm will fail or I'll kill it unknowingly in the middle of the night and I will get the phone call "Hey where are you? We're in the van see you over there looser, beers on you."

Today had a special wrinkle. RANDOM DRUG TEST! YEA! Turn out the place I have to go is just two blocks away from the hotel and the drug test lady that calls says I can go in my civies not uniform, so I walked. Random drug testing is the FAAs way of ensuring that most pilots restrict themselves to pedestrian alcohol abuse restricted to narrow off duty hours. Sign the forms, walk in, breath test first, pee test next, sign the warm sample bottles and we are done.

The Wiz Quiz.

HI

Sigh

More fun at work.

Bears

For  Steve